Thankfulness or Crankfulness

Thankfulness or Crankfulness. It's a phrase Matt and I heard in a parenting book we are going through and it has really got me thinking. God has been teaching us a lot in the last few days since coming back to Spokane. I will be honest....the transition back has been rough. I'm pretty sure that our household appliances, electronics, and a number of other things have conspired to crash or malfunction since we returned. Between fixing things, doctor's appts to try to figure out my health problems, and dealing with Blake's sudden increase in scream sessions and disobedience, I confess I have rarely felt thankful. How do I take the stress of traveling for weeks on end with two young kids, packing, unpacking, dealing with mice infestations and 45 minute meltdowns and infections and computer crashes....and have a thankful attitude, full of praise? Sometimes I feel like it's so much easier and more natural to choose to be cranky and complain than choose to be thankful. I have so much to learn when it comes to dealing with stress, but God has shown me several things recently. First of all, when we focus on the bad, it's so easy to lose sight of the good, and there is SO much good!

"Be joyful always; pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18

Secondly, laughter is SUCH a gift. Whether it's being on a road trip and having a spider run full force at me over the dashboard TWICE (yes it happened two separate times, believe it or not), accidentally stepping on a tube of diaper cream and having it squirt three feet over the carpet (just happened today), or putting Dawn dish soap in the dishwasher and having it overflow with bubbles, God is the creator of humor and He intends for us to enjoy it! One day we will look back at this time and say "remember when we were trying to take our family picture in the snow and Blake was acting up and knocked me over while trying to keep him in place?" These are precious memories.

Thirdly, Matt and I have heard, and concur, that parenting is the hardest job we will ever have. There will be stages that will feel easy, and fun, and full of joy. Then there will be stages that will stretch us further than we ever thought possible. The last few days have definitely been the latter. We have failed over and over again, lost our patience, and at times been at a complete loss of what to do with Blake. How do we exercise patience when he just hit or pulled the cat's tail for the fiftieth time and no discipline seems to be getting through to him? One thing that God has clearly spoken to me about is how I use my words with him. I borrowed a quote from a friend's blog that really hit home for both Matt and I....

“Words have the ability to inspire or to depress; to make one happy and feel validated or to deplete and discourage. When we live with our children day after day, we either build an inheritance, a treasure chest of inspiration, confidence, validation, OR memories of anger, criticism, while storing up in their souls hostility, insecurity, and bitterness.” -Sally Clarkson

Ephesians 4:29 says "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." When we are tired or stressed it's easy to be short with our children or focus on the negative aspects of their behavior and fail to acknowledge the little triumphs and positive things.

God is undeservingly patient with us, so why shouldn't we be with our little ones? It is a battle from day to day, but God has reminded us to actively lift up and encourage our kids, even when it doesn't seem like there is much to go on. It's a big job, but I am so thankful for each of them and I look to Jesus for His supernatural strength and patience for the tough times.

*The parenting book we are reading (that we highly recommend) is called "Loving the Little Years" by Rachel Jankovic